Ask Away!

These are the questions you asked and the comments you made, per email, tumblr, twitter or whatever (I don't know, do you stalk me? Jokes.)

• "Tell something you did to avoid telling someone you're not interested in them." - Anonymous

Haha, I like that!

I actually once told this guy I was a lesbian. He didn't believe me and started being all weird about it, so I went up to my best friend and fake-snogged her. It was all very comical.

• "Do you play an instrument and if yes, what was the last song you played?" - Anonymous

I play the cello and the piano - and yesterday evening, I taught myself how to play Blame It On The Rain my He Is We.

• "Which celebrity do you look like most?" - Anonymous

I don't really know that myself, but some people tell me I look like Hilary Duff when she was still chubbier. And some girl that was on the Jeremy Kyle Show once.

• "Do you have a middle name?" - Isabel

My full name is Anna Sophia Johanne Charlotte, which is really weird.

• "What do you look for in a guy?" - Anonymous

He has to be two things: actually male, and breathing. Both, if missing, can cause a lot of trouble. Just imagine...

• "Who is Josh Devine???" - Anonymous

Is this a test????

I have no idea who the F he is, go google or something, whatever.

I just realised I shouldn't have written those last three answers if I don't want to be killed by millions of fangirls. But hey. Whatever, right?

• "If you ever met Harry Styles, what would you ask him?" - Anonymous

I swear, these three questions all came in on one day, I am totally certain that's the same person TELL ME WHO THE HELL YOU AAAAARE!

Hum.

I'd probably ask him how the hell he manages to stand on one foot with the other touching the ground with the tip of his shoe in all the photos I've ever seen (which, TBH, are like four) because every single effing time I've tried doing that, I've fallen flat on my face. I do not have the best sense of balance, but still. He has to be an alien or something. Doesn't he like have four nipples as well? I TOLD YOU SO.

• "What do you think about One Direction?" - Anonymous

Mate, are you the same Anon that asked the JB question? That's lame.

But well, okay.

I do admit that they're adorable and quality lushness, but they sort of sound so autotuned, even though obviously they CAN sing since they were on the X Factor the only season I actually watched that. And I don't like quiffs. But the lyrics are so sweet. So sweet. (Apart from WMYB, and yes, I know fan slang, whoo.) My friend Anna's totally in sappy puppy love with them, so since I am writing a fanfic for her birthday and had to research, I probably know more about them than half their fanbase, which is scarily dedicated, BTW, and I've even been to a concert. It scared me.

But yeah. Still working on getting an opinion on them. (that's my DANCE JAM!)

Oh and, they're all bromance, aren't they? I like that, I s'pose, since I'm half of the Essie Muke chickmance, so YOU GO GIRLFRIENDS. I guess.
Their girlfriends make me question my sexuality, by the way. Eleanor Calder is my ultimate girl crush, just because she's so pretty, and sweet, and funny. I don't know, she's just so prettyyy. I'm so weird.
Louis, if you ever read this, I won't judge you, you can go along and have Harry if I can have Eleanor. Bing-bang-boom, everyone's happy. (If I were you, I'd keep her as well, though...)

• "What do you think about Justin Bieber?" - Anonymous

I don't like Justin Bieber, I'm sorry, but if I want to listen to a five-year-old sing, I can babysit and GET PAID money instead of spendiing it, so enough said. "When I was thirteen, I had my first love?" I don't know about you guys, but when I was thirteen, I had braces and glasses and everyone hated me, so screw you.

• "Do you like anyone right now?" - Anonymous

I like everyone. Except unicorns. And my dad. I don't like my dad.

          Just putting this in, even though it's totally irrelevant, because it's a tumblr question I got and I was GOBSMACKED:

• Hi, I'm asking you because you're English and you know all sorts of stuff so maybe you have an idea... Because, I really love One Direction, and they said they liked playing something called Fifa or whatever, do you know what kind of game that is? Is that an English thing??? -Anonymous

I highly, highly recommend you go crawl into a hole and die from embarassment.

• "Is it logical to hate someone for being so perfect?" -Azalea, 15

Uhm, not really, I guess no, but normal. For us girls, it is. We work that way. We hate pople, especially other girls, all the time because they're better than us, and we want to make their lives living hell because, let's face it, that's what we learn to do. We learn how to be the worst kind of bees on the planet when we're, like, three and that other girl has the barbie we've always wanted. BOOM, bitch-slap, catfight.

• "Fuck off with your dimples, it's SO cute I just wanna hug you all the time and you're a newbie and probably like 18 and even older than me lol." - Anonymous

OMG I love you, too, OMG. You should totally come out of Anon Mode and we could be friends forever hahaha. And you’re so cute, I just think that it’s really weird that you can see the dimple in one cheek really clearly and the other one’s just, like, faded over the years hahaha. And FYI, I’m not “like 18”, I’m actually 15 haha. Only three more months mwahahaaaa etc. PS: BTW, you just restored my trust in and love for anon people on tumblr. I love you.

• "So you don't like unicorns and rainbows confude you. You probably don't like chocolate either, huh? WHAT KIND OF PERSON ARE YOU? GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN!!!" - Anonymous

Uhm, yeah, they do confuse me? Because there’s never an end and I ran until my feet were bleeding when I was a kid to find the damn end AND THERE WAS NO END!!! Okay? And I like chocolate. Chocolate makes me happy.So why don’t YOU just go out of MY kitchen since YOU, dear anon, are on MY blog even though NOBODY’S MAKING YOU so technically, if it’s anyone’s kitchen, it’s MINE so SCREW YOU. (This is big, I usually NEVER swear!) When you’re brave enough to say that using your real name and not being damn ANONYMOUS, maybe we’ll talk again. Until then, have a NICE, LONELY LIFE because if you’re criticising people for being scared, NOBODY WILL EVER LIKE YOU because THAT’S MEAN. Having said that, it was nice meeting you. SO NICE. 
PS: And FYI, it’s confuse. With an s. Just saying. Not that I, other than some other people here, criticise people for insignificant stuff like spelling, or being scared of unicorns.

• "What are the most important turn ons and turn offs for you, and why?" - Vera, 18

You mean, like, in a guy? Or in girls or what??? (Haha. Jokes.)

Turn ons: I think a real turn on is actually a beautiful personality. Pretty is who pretty does and all that mush. I mean, I've been crazy about guys who weren't good-looking or my type at all but who were my type personality-wise. I like guys who are funny and even a bit childish because then I can, I dunno, pamper them a bit. Cause I like cooking and such. But they still have to be protective. So yeah. Personality. (That was way too long.)

I don't know why, maybe it's because I'm so obsessed with it, but I always pay attention to other people's hair. I like guys with curls or just-got-out-of-bed-hair because you just want to run your hands through it. Hate blondes. I don't know why, I just don't like it if a guy has fairer hair than me.

A guy has to be older and taller than me. I'm pretty short (well, 5'5'' definitely isn't tall) so that's usually not a problem at all. And since I left out one year of school (because I'm such a genius) I'm always around older people, almost all of my friends are at least a year older than me. So I usually feel that people my age are pretty immature and ridiculous.
I'm really into husky voices. Sexy voices in general. I'm a singer - well, not professional or anything, but I'm in a few choirs and sometimes people book me for small events liek weddings or such - so I just think a good voice is a really big turn on. I'm just into low and sometimes unusual voices and I really fancy huskiness. Just saying that again.

Turn offs: I don't like long hair - yeah this is about hair again. By long hair I mean that it's longer than, say, that spot below your ear where your jawline makes that turn (I dunno what it's called, I'm an idiot.) I mean, when it's dry. A lot of people with curls - as well as myself - have really long-looking hair when it's wet or straightened and normally, it looks really really short. Yeah.
I hate smoking. Period.

I hate it when guys are too serious and don't have a sense of humour (yeah, personality...). That's really important because I joke around all the time and I'm very melodramatic. If a guy doesn't get my (or my besto's) sarcasm, he'll be insulted all the time...

Half of my childhood I spent first in a Christian kindergarten and then in fairly strict and disciplined Boarding Schools. Manners are SO important to me, even though you don't really notice. Farting, burping, and all that -ing stuff are absolutely disgusting! A guy without good manners doesn't have a chance. I mean, I'm one of these "Yes, Sir."-"Excuse me, Miss."-girls. I don't even swear, well, not normally.

• "Three crazy things you've never told anyone before?" - Allie, 16

Awe, you again, Allie! I love you!!! Okay, wait for it .... prepare ...............

1) In case of a Zombie Invasion, I have an 80% chance of survival.

2) I actually cried like a baby when I screwed up my first Bavarian Cream.

3) Apparently - that is what a stupid internet test ("Who's your celebrity twin?" or some shit) that we did in Girls' School House on our last weekend told me - I am 98% Harry Styles. You know the curly One Direction dude. What the hell? That's a guy!!!

• "Do you usually sing in the shower? If yes, what song?" - Isabel

That's actually really funny. Yeah, I sing under the shower sometimes, but more often, I sing while I'm blowdrying my hair. Because that's when NOBODY can hear you. :) And then I just sing random stuff - right now it's a lot of Barely Blind, because I love them, but it usually goes more in the The Fray direction...

But under the shower ... My usual Shower-Song is Tomorrow. You know, from Annie. I don't know why. Always has been, always will.

• "What was your first kiss like?" - Vera, 18

My best friend still calls him Saliva Boy because he was just drooling so much. Ew. Yeah, basically, it felt like having a slug in your mouth.

That's all I want to say about that.

• "Who do you cuddle up to at night?" - Allie, 16

That's a weird question as well. Huh. Okay, actually it's what. 

I mean, I'd like to tell you that it's my super hot boyfriend but in reality, it's a stuffed animal my Mum made for me when I was like four. It looks like a rabbit and a donkey had a kid, and it's really weird. It has a little hole from where I managed to burn it when I was five.

So yeah. That's kind of sad.

Which is why finding a person to cuddle up to is on my Bucket List For Summer 2012.

• "Which animal do you hate the most / like the least?" - Anonymous

They're not real, but if they were, I'd absolutely loathe Unicorns. Because I'd be so scared of them. I mean, they've got f-ing HORNS on their foreheads.

HOW IS THAT NOT SCARY???

• "Do you like carrots?" - Allie, 16

That has to be about the worst and most random question anyone's ever asked me, which is exactly why I love it and I'm going to answer it.

Yes, yes I do.

I actually used to have a horse (his name was Star - don't judge, I didn't name him) and every time my Mum gave me carrots for him, I used to eat them. Awful, I know. Like, when she gave me two, which was usually the case, Star would get, like, half of one?

I still like them - but uncooked, puhlease. Just the way they are. (See what I did there?) I'm sorta addicted, it's really sad that I can't eat them right now cause I just recently had mouth surgery. (That sounds dodgy....)

What I actually wanted to say: Yes.

• "What is your favourite inanimate object?" - Anonymous

A teapot. Definitely a teapot.

• "What book are you reading right now?" - Liz

Oh, you really don't want to know this - it's actually Shakespeare's King Lear. Summer Holiday Reading, whoo! But I just started and what I read before that and finished on Wednesday, was I've Got Your Number by Sophie Kinsella. Her books are really good for the holidays and awfully girly.